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What Microsoft Is This the Altair Basic of (Redux)

by Larry Chiang on July 28, 2015

by Larry Chiang (no rights reserved, no copyright, no attribution or link back requested πŸ™‚

One essay takes you from Silicon Valley outsider to Bay Area insider.

This essay.

This one essay gets you deeper into YC and deeper than deep into Stanford University knowledge. This essay is the sequel to Paul Graham’s three quarters baked, essay “What Microsoft is this, the Altair Basic of?”

#hiLarryAss: I take what alpha males flippantly publish direct to Techmeme. I bookmark it. I read it in my dorm room. I print it out in my brain. Then I re-read and read. And then re-read. Remember, PG (Paul Graham) tweeted, “This most important graph I draw for founders” BUT DOES HE EMBED THIS PIC INTO THE BLOG POST OF THE SAME NAME!?! … no!!!

I took time to make this…

PG: This graph I draw all the time PG: This graph I draw all the time for FOUNDERS (artist rendition credit: Larry CHIANG)

The point of this graph is to emphasize: altair basic was a big turd that made very few, Uber happy*.
The point of this graph is to emphasize What They Don’t Teach You at YC but do teach you in ENGR145: Cross ‘The Chasm’** From The Right*.
The point of this graph is to make an incredibly small subset of dinosaurs happy.
The point of this graph to emphasize your startup is poop about to be polished up

Artist credit: Paul Graham, co-founder Y combinator Artist credit: Paul Graham, co-founder Y combinator.

Let me repeat: You want to make a small group, super duper happy.

The point of this graph is to emphasize: EUBM. Engineer up a business model
The point of this graph is to emphasize: Sell it first. Then. Code it
The point of this graph is to ace ‘marketing timing’ with a widget that is fugly.
This graph teases: Do things that dont scale but have momentum #dttdsBHM

PG did not even take the time to embed this pic. His pic, into HIS blog article that shares the same name. PG wrote a blog post in the exact title of this blog post. PG drew the graph. PG did not take the extra time to mentor you by embedding the graph of the same name into this blog post, of the same name. But, I did.

Pattern recognition: This Altair Basic slide is not as sexy as it needs to be Pattern recognition: This Altair Basic slide is not as sexy as it needs to be. Why?! Flipping the vertical axis and switching the curves to points gets rid of the penis shaped graph in FIG 1; Fig 2; Fig 4 and Fig 8

 

*No rights reserved. Funny double entendre was intended.

One essay takes you from Silicon Valley outsider to Bay Area insider RE: What Microsoft is this, the Altair Basic of? Unfortunately, you’re gonna have to re read it because it is written in #LarryChiangSky (semi intelligible American. Dbl entendre to make my last name sound Polish is intended πŸ™‚

Thus, then I solved this blog post: “What Microsoft Is This The Altair Basic of.” with a sequence of pictures like a true Steven Zumdahl mentee:
FTC Disclosure: Chalmers Sechrist was an asshole. He confirmed this fact in an email to me.

RE What Microsoft is this the Altair Basic of? Larry Chiang is CTCFTR ENGR-145

 

What Microsoft is this the Altair Basic of Larry Chiang is CTCFTR ENGR-145 Pattern recognition: What Microsoft is this, startup-that-is-pitching-me-in-Coupa Cafe; the Altair Basic, of? (Insert phallic joke here)

I am actually physically turned on right now.

Set aside PG for a moment. Forget about Altair Basic. Focus on the chasm.
**The innovation chasm:

Figure 6.2 from Professor Blank's #ENGR245 book: The Chasm Figure 6.2 from Professor Blank’s #ENGR245 book: The Chasm

The attempt to cross ‘the chasm’** in the Geoffrey Moore sense of the phrase:


Portions of the Chasm are easier to cross. It's like I am the only one in Silicon Valley that understands gravity or friction de la sales Portions of the Chasm are easier to cross. It’s like I am the only one in Silicon Valley that understands gravity or friction de la sales

So when you say: What Microsoft, is this the altair basic of?
The answer is #ENGR145x.
What Microsoft, is your startup, the Altair Basic, of…

… your startup needs to execute the 7 hashtags that lead up toΒ #ENGR145x

E145x is just one slide E145x is just one slide

END ESSAY.

FTC Disclosure: Professor Steve Zumdahl taught me chem. I used that Chem knowledge to graduate #1 in starting salary: Nalco Chemical. Thus, I graph super good.

FTC Disclosure: I placed out of 100% of my engineering undergrad chem requirements using “AP style testing”. I crashed chem class(es) with permission of Professor Zumdahl.

grammatically incorrect to hide my SAT 720 verbal and to emphasize my engineering degree. “University of Illinois”

W-h-o-p-p-e-r: Silicon Valley and technology industry relies on the Hollywood sequel style of lowest common denom crap, as much ass Hollywood does. Let me explain this whopper of an insight with a YouTube in a year… Microsoft corp was a sequel to Altair. You see, Microsoft started as an operating system on a product that it did not own. If you’re a CS major, undergrad subscriber, you will recognize the “#ExternalAPI; external application protocol interface”. Microsoft wrote a protocol so that Altair could interface with a printer that was external to the Altair box.

The founder with the Altair box RE: What microsoft is this the Altair Basic of The founder with the Altair box RE: What microsoft is this the Altair Basic of

WHOPPER:

what microsoft is this the Altair Basic of Larry Chiang CTCFTR what microsoft is this the Altair Basic of Larry Chiang CTCFTR What Microsoft is this the Altair Basic of Larry Chiang is CTCFTR ENGR-145 What Microsoft is this the Altair Basic of Larry Chiang is CTCFTR ENGR-145

More

CS 183s is a sequel to CS183b CS 183s is a sequel to CS183b

More:

FTC DISCLOSURE: I financially benefit from Stanford teaching me its content, in the real world at Huang and Terman Engineering, in the real word at 656 Knight and online at their respective YouTube channels here and here.

theorem derivation:

Someone made fun of me calling me the Third Institution and Paris Hilton of Silicon Valley. I do not like getting made fun of. Just because I like the party and the notworking. Just because I DJ (ideas not music like Paris). Just because I am tall and hot. Those all are reasons to not make fun of me. I resemble an “institution” or a ‘fixture’ on the Silicon Valley scene. I am person with an 88 for an IQ darnit.

So.

So, I got to dreaming RE: what are the other two institutions?
Self answer myself: Y-c and Stanford

Then I solved this blog post: “What Microsoft Is This The Altair Basic of.”
FTC Disclosure: Chalmers Sechrist was an asshole. He confirmed this fact in an email to me.

RE What Microsoft is this the Altair Basic of? Larry Chiang is CTCFTR ENGR-145

 

What Microsoft is this the Altair Basic of Larry Chiang is CTCFTR ENGR-145 Pattern recognition: What Microsoft is this, startup-that-is-pitching-me-in-Coupa Cafe; the Altair Basic, of? (Insert phallic joke here)

FTC Disclosure: Professor Steve Zumdahl taught me chem. I used that Chem knowledge to graduate #1 in starting salary: Nalco Chemical. Thus, I graph super good.

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